Curly hair tips for those of you (and your daughters) who need to tame the frizzies!
The reason there isn’t a picture of my daughter is that she has straight hair. And it’s blonde. And she’s tan… it’s a cruel world, people. However, I know there are plenty of you straight haired mamas who have curly haired daughters and need some help!
Curly hair is not easy. It is not “oh just wash it and be free.” It is mysterious, tricky and hard work. It took me forever and ever to figure out how to take care of my curly hair and I still can’t quite predict if it will turn out or not.
When kids are young the curls will take care of themselves, but as they grow older then curly hair will need attention that straight hair does not. If you want to save them a lot of time and effort then try these tricks. Plus, I’m hoping some of you curly haired beauties can chime in on some tips of your own. Let’s all learn something here, shall we?
1.  Do not ever ever – I repeat ever – brush out the curls.
If you tell me that you brush out your curls and they don’t look frizzy, well, frankly I don’t believe you. And if you actually are telling the truth then you are the luckiest curly-haired woman I have had the pleasure of knowing. But first ask your friends, you may find that it is actually frizzy and you’re in denial. Anyway, strands of hair naturally group together to form curls. If you brush out your child’s hair then you are separating the strands from their natural groupings, thus creating space which causes the dreaded frizz or this look, except not nearly as classy. If they need to brush it, then brush their hair in the shower so that afterwards it can be wet, and the hair will naturally separate on its own again.
How to help your daughter “grow into” her curls
2. Part it as desired in the shower.Â
One thing that used to “do my head in” (pun intended) was styling my “part.” When you separate your child’s curls to create a part, that area will look frizzier than the rest of their hair. My hair would curl nicely everywhere except on the top of my head, right where everyone first lays their eyes. I started washing and conditioning my hair, then parting it as desired while still in the shower. After it was parted, I wet my head again so the curls would form together naturally.
3.  Don’t turn your head upside down or stick it up in a towel.Â
Okay, so you can carefully turn your head upside down. The key here is to avoid doing anything that artificially separates the curls from how they naturally form. The best way I’ve found to towel dry my locks is to simply blot them like I would a stain. This way excess moisture is being absorbed, but you aren’t separating the curls. Now, if I plan on straightening my hair I’ll do all of the above because it won’t matter. However, if I plan on wearing my hair down and curly, I’m careful.
4. Find the right gel, mousse or combination.Â
I could never make mousse work for me. It always made my hair look wet in random places, even after hours of wear. Parts were shiny slick and others were frizzy. I found a no frizz gel that prevents fly aways and actually makes my curls look more natural. Or rather, helps the natural wave of my curls be the spotlight. This will take some tweaking and probably require you buy a few products that your child tests over time.
If you live in a cold climate and shower in the morning, then you’ll have to find a product that can be used and then lightly blown dry so they don’t leave home with a wet head. (Side note: when I lived in Italy they were very adamant you should never have a wet head, even in the summer. Once I saw a mother at the beach change her toddler’s swimming trunks every time he got out of the water so he never had on wet shorts…weird.)  I will use no other gel than the above mentioned and now that I’m living away from home, I get my mom to send it to me in bulk. Thank you, mother.
I know curly hair can have that “wild, crazy and free” look that is beautiful. However, I never could make that happen. Without the above tricks mine just looked “insane, psycho, and on the loose.” So that’s it. Even with these tricks, the curls may still do their own will and leave your child helpless. But, at least you gave it your best effort. Straight hair is relatively easy to handle, curly hair requires a crafty hand.
If you start practicing these things with your curly-haired children early then they might be the only ones in 7th grade who can pull their hair off. Do you have any tricks? Can you air dry and prevent frizz? Do you sleep with wet hair or wash it in the morning?
That’s the hubs and I in a London tube station on our way to Hillsong. Both, rocking the curls.
I love the photo of you and your hubby. As always, you are so gorgeous. My hair is bizarre and wavy and equally as frustrating as super curly hair. I have always wished I was one of those women who could wash her hair and let it air dry. :) Haha! I look like a hot mess when I do that.
Oh sometimes I take a shower and let it air dry and then we just laugh at my head. It’s awful…ha. I think wavy hair is so pretty, though! I just hate spending a lot of time doing my hair too so that is also a problem. Maybe it’s laziness or just a reflection on how I’m just not willing to spend a lot of time on my looks. Particularly not right now when I barely leave the house :)
I definitely picked up a few tips from this–which is saying something, since I have joked with my family about patenting my method of creating curly hair from wavy hair! I have weird hair that is fine, frizzy, and only slightly wavy if I let it air dry (straighter in some spots, and slightly wavy/curly in others). But with TLC, it can be quite naturally curly. I have always broken the “don’t turn your head upside down” rule. The moment I turn off the shower stream, I flip my sopping-wet head upside down and start gently scrunching my hair to squeeze out excess water and encourage it to fight gravity without separating curl groups. As soon as it is no longer dripping, I get out of the shower and add a hefty amount of curl mousse, flip my head upside down again, and work it through my very wet hair in the same scrunch-and-squeeze method. Then I do the same for a small amount of gel. (The gel helps fight frizz, but using too much gives my hair that hard, gelled, unnatural look that makes it appear that it’s still wet, several hours after my shower. Mousse doesn’t have that effect for me.) Once the mousse and gel are worked through and any excess moisture is squeezed out (I’m usually leaning over the bathtub while doing this!), I bust out my blow dryer. On the lowest heat and speed setting, I flip my head upside down and use the diffuser to catch sections of my hair and push them up towards my head. The wavy hair will sort of naturally curl into a ringlet as the diffuser carries it upward. I hold it there and just let the heat set the curls for about 10-15 seconds, and then do it again with another section. This not only takes me from wavy-haired to curly-haired, but it also makes my curls look soft and sweet, instead of hard, shiny, and full of product. I’m sure this method seems weird or potentially disastrous depending on what type of curl you have, but if someone has the same type of hair as me, it actually works great. People are always surprised how much my hair can naturally curl, since it’s so baby-fine and looks terrible (and not curly at all!) if allowed to air-dry.
So you mousse AND gel? That is interesting. And you get your hair coated, then sop out the excess and then blow dry? I’m going to try this because I’m in a curly hair funk :) Thank you so much!
Yes, and yes! I would love to know how it works out for you. (I think so much depends on hair type, so I have no idea how my method would work for someone with true curly hair.) I think it makes a huge difference that I use a lot of product so that it is really worked through.
I have mega curly hair and I do basically same as Melissa coating hair then GENTLY diffusing upside down.
I use TONS of ‘oils’ though… When wet before other products and after when dry and through out the day to touch up. I love Morrocan Oil but it’s $$$. I mostly use Fructis (sp?) sleek and shine oil, works good and is cheap. Also if your curly hair you should try Diva Curl! It’s the best ‘shampoo and conditioner’ for curl hair and the other products that go with it work too
THANK YOU for these tips!!!! So you diffuse gently meaning you make sure it’s not sopping, but don’t blow it all dry? Oils… never tried those. Do you put them in when the hair is wet?
LOVE this! I have a head full of THICK curly hair! I use L.A. Looks Sport Gel ($1.97 at Walmart). I found it works and have used it for the past 15 years. I turn my head over (wet) and srunch it with the gel so it will get all through my hair. Then I spray Tresemme Heat Protection Spray and I blow dry with a diffuser until it’s 75% dry. Then I will use a non-humidity hair spray to keep it from frizzing. I live in South Alabama with curly hair, so I have to use some kind of humidity spray. :)
Girl you got a SYSTEM! Ha. Love it so much. I wash the hair and use the purple Aussie no frizz gel, only a small amount, then turn my head upside down gently and air dry. :)
Thanks for sharing the tips! My baby girl has natural curly hair and I will try this for hair right away.
What about curly haired little boys?
Awwwww! So sweet, same thing
Did I read this too quickly? I didn’t see the tip about “Don’t wash it every day.” I don’t have curly hair, but my girls do. I finally found a friend who has naturally curly hair WHO ISN’T a FRIZZ ball… haha… to get her tips! That was her #1 tip… don’t wash it every day. She only washes hers once a week, but she wets it daily in the shower. She also said NEVER BRUSH IT. And she recommended a product to put in it while it is still wet and let it air dry. (We are currently in Indonesia… so I won’t bother with the product name, but it is more like a cream from a tub instead of a gel or mousse.) My girls’ curls have NEVER BEEN BETTER when they follow these tips.
Review
1. Do not wash daily, but wet daily in the shower and use conditioner daily.
2. Never brush your hair… fingers only.
3. Slightly towel dry so the hair isn’t dripping (but no crazy rubbing)
4. Add some sort of styling cream to leave-in
5. Air dry