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Home » Sleeping » Wind-down Routines Guaranteed to Help Your Baby Sleep

Wind-down Routines Guaranteed to Help Your Baby Sleep

Updated January 15, 2021

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Want simple chaos-erasing family routines? Who doesn't? Check out our Family Routines Reboot!

Want simple chaos-erasing family routines? Who doesn't? Check out our Family Routines Reboot!

Does your baby or toddler fight sleep? Here are some wind down routines that will help your baby get in the mood to sleep. They make bedtime a breeze!

Inside you’ll find wind down routines guaranteed to help baby sleep. Baby sleep struggles are one of the major reasons people land on my blog. 


Babies need sleep.

Mamas need sleep.

But sleep, unfortunately, isn’t always easy to be had.

The good news is this: everyone was born to have regenerative sleep!

I talk a lot about how important it is our little ones are sleeping well and this becomes exponentially important the more children you have because – quite simply – you can’t stay up all night every night with 3 little bundles of joy.

The fact is, if you are up a lot at night then you actually *are* losing your mind.

closeup of baby foot

A good rule of thumb?

One definite way to help your babies get in the mood for sleep is to have a consistent bedtime wind-down routine.

This means you can’t take them from a living room full of the other screaming family members and just put them in a dark room ready to sleep in 2 minutes.

Just as you wouldn’t be able to sleep with such a quick transition, neither can they.

Related Reads: 

  • Baby Bedtime: 4 Essential Elements For Success
  • Tips For Swaddling Baby At Night

What’s a wind-down routine?

A wind-down is something that:

  • Helps signal bedtime is coming;
  • Is consistent;
  • Calms the baby;
  • Gives opportunity for physical touch and togetherness; and
  • Helps the baby become drowsy, but not fully asleep.

Read: Foolproof Baby Sleep Tips — Routines, Habits & Strategies

things you must consider when swaddling baby at night

The 5 “basics” behind a wind down routine

More research comes out every year showcasing the importance of “brain training.”

In a nutshell, what we do over and over again becomes second nature to our brains.

If you’re trying to get a handle on this from the get go, I’d recommend using our daily baby logs and mom logs to get it all out of your head and onto paper.

1. They go on autopilot

Natural conditioning helps develop healthy sleeping habits. The same happens with our children except we are the ones who help to train their brains, so to speak.

If you want your baby to wind down well to help promote healthy sleep, there are certain behaviors that will help do this.

Baby has trouble sleeping? Get my free 3 part series on the 3 main reasons babies don’t sleep (AND their solutions) in your inbox…

2. Dim lights

Turning the lights lower in the evening, whether by lighting a candle or turning on a lamp instead of the ceiling light, can help signal to the brain it’s time to produce melatonin.

This is the drowsy hormone and helps calm the body down in anticipation of sleep. This is really helpful for babies who have witching hours.

baby wind-down routine cards on wall
Printable wind down routines

3. Quiet

I realize this can seem like a pipe dream if there are young children in the house. But… even for a baby, quiet will help calm the mind. Avoid loud music, TV, or activities that stimulate.

You may need to do a calm down trick  to help everyone in the house simmer down, but it’s worth it.

Read: How To Keep Louder Siblings Away From Baby

4. Easy Focus

Avoid having anything too mentally active or stimulating in the wind down routine. For example, you wouldn’t want to do a puzzle or any type of activity that requires concentration.

However, reading a book is a perfect wind down routine element because it’s easy focus. This is particularly true for babies and children.

They can look and listen but don’t have to do anything “active”. Listening can be an activity that is calming.

Related:

  • How To Read To Kids Who Won’t Sit Still
  • The Best Christian Children’s Books
  • How To Increase Small Children’s Reading Stamina
baby resting with teddy bear

5. Soothing environment

Studies have shown that some scents (lavender for example) actually serve to decrease the activity of the nervous system, helping lull you into a sleep ready state.

Here are some ways to help create a soothing environment:

  • Diffuse essential oils
  • Turn on white noise
  • Close the light blocking curtains so the room is dim
printable wind-down routine cards for your baby
Printable routine cards to help you remember your routine

Examples of what to include in your routine

There are many ways to help your baby wind down. While some will undoubtedly work better than others, you can choose what works best for your family.

  • A warm bath or shower
  • Applying lotion, powder, or cream
  • Baby massage
  • Giving baby a pacifier (this is the best there is)
  • Turning the lights down low or lighting candles
  • Singing or listening to calming music
  • Reading books (here’s how to read to little ones who won’t sit still)
  • Snuggle time with mom and dad
  • Swaddling
  • Rocking until drowsy
  • White noise (this works wonders)
  • Sitting or lying together
  • Praying

Sample wind down routines

First of all, it’s very important to note that establishing and following a sleeping schedule is essential for mastering any wind down routine.

For example, if baby is too fussy because he has been awake too long… trying a wind down routine may prove to be more difficult. It’s best to start a wind down routine as part of a healthy sleep schedule.

I had very similar, but slightly different routines with my two oldest children… here they are as examples:

  • My oldest child- I started the routine by giving the pacifier (this signaled sleepy). Then, I would read one or two short stores and rocked in the rocking chair. I would always be sure to dim the lights. I would end with by signing a song and giving lots of gentle kisses.
  • My second oldest child– He loved massages… so I started with some lavender lotion and a little rub on his arms and legs. He didn’t care for the pacifier so I didn’t stress about that. He also got to listen to a few short books and then we would lie together for a few minutes.

Whatever you choose to include in your wind down routine, your child is sure to learn to recognize them and ease his or her way into peaceful sleep. Try a few from the list above and when you find something that works… stick to it.

Remember… routine and consistency are key.

You got this, momma!

Want to help your baby’s bedtime be more calm and relaxing? Get your wind down routine checklist here!

While there are many more, you don’t want to spend 3 hours on a bedtime routine. The goal is to help the baby get drowsy and then put them in their crib while still slightly awake.

A great wind-down routine actually can be the difference between a baby who fights sleep all night and one who sleeps peacefully.

baby massage

The fact of the matter is…

Babies go to sleep better and sleep longer when they are calm, settled, and in a good routine. It doesn’t have to be a huge thing with church bells and four part harmony.

The more you are able to protect your baby’s sleep, create a good wind-down routine, and make it a regular part of your evening, the better your whole family will sleep.

To recap, to help your babies sleep better at night you want to:

  • Prevent them from getting overtired
  • Choose an appropriate bedtime
  • Give your baby a calming bath or wipe down
  • Before putting on a clean diaper and swaddle, give your baby a rubdown or massage with nice calming lotions
  • Have some quiet quality time to help get your baby very drowsy before putting him into the crib.

If you would like to create a simple and easy wind down routine that anyone putting baby down can follow plus some BONUS baby sleep troubleshooting checklists, click here and get instant access.

the baby sleep printable pack

::

I’ve created a free email series just for you! There are truly only a few reasons why babies and toddlers have struggles sleeping… really, I mean it. I am going to teach you the main 3 reasons and how to start making small changes to help your baby go from:

  • fighting sleep to embracing it
  • night wakings to sleeping through
  • needing you to jump through hoops to going to sleep on their own

Click here to sign up for my free email series or simply click on the image below.

Baby Sleep Funnel Opt In With Free

Rachel

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Filed Under: Basic Sleep Tips, Sleeping

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I'm Rachel, mother of 5 young kids living in the Florida panhandle with my Australian husband. I write about family culture, family rhythms and routines, and boundaries in motherhood and life. You can see snippets of my daily life here and visit my shop for baby sleep, organizing, and routine help.

“Inside my brain”

Geeezzz, it was like you were inside my brain today!  (and most days recently)  I needed this badly.

Thank you!!!
Andrea P.

“Nothing was working…”

I just wanted to say thank you for your easy peasy routine for 2 year olds! I day-weaned my 2 year old a month ago and have been trying everything to get him to go down for a nap without the nursing. Nothing was working and I was starting to think he would never have a nap again.

Anyways I started following your routine and we just sat in bed and had what I told him was “quiet time.” We sat and read and made a fort and had warm milk. Then today I told him it was quiet time again and he tried to escape the bed a couple times, but in the end he snuggled up after the warm bottle and fell asleep for 3 hours! I was almost in tears I was so excited! So thank you!

Meghan

“Thanks for your bundle!”

Thanks for for doing this Everyday Mom Super Bundle sale. I’m four months into my parenthood journey with a sweet and spirited boy.

I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated just yesterday, thinking if only I had the right resources and “trail guides” I could figure this all out. Your sale is serendipitous. I can’t wait to dig into my download materials and start learning from your tips.

Thanks for sharing your knowledge!

Lauren N.

“It’s a breath of fresh air”

I just wanted to let you know that your blog and emails have been a tremendous help to me. Your practical, honest, and humble writing is a breath of fresh air!

With help and encouragement drawn from your writing, I have made some incredible changes in the order (and sanity) of our home, in just the past few weeks. My kids are doing chores daily, and I also have clearer expectations of myself.

My husband is in awe!

Which helps reinforce what you said- the problem wasn’t me; it was my systems. Our home is in much better order, and so is my mind. So, thank you!!!! You have made a difference for me and my family.

Ann S.

“We are slowly getting back to normal…”

I stumbled upon your blog one morning after praying night after night for God to fix my home! I had just had a baby this May 1st and also have a 2 and 4 year old and my home broke out in complete chaos!

Even my marriage seemed like it was on the brink of extinction and this had happened in 2 weeks! I read numerous amounts of your entries and applied them to my home life and I am happy to say we are slowly getting back to normal. Thank you Rachel! 

Madison S.

“You’ve been a life saver!”

I’m a first time mom to a 15 day old baby girl. I had no idea what I was doing and couldn’t get her to sleep in her crib until I found your blog.

You’ve been a life saver!

Candace R.

“Within a week or two our little girl changed!”

I tumbled into post partum depression/anxiety and didn’t know what to do anymore. I was a mess, baby girl was a mess and I don’t even know how my husband was dealing with it all… 

I googled everything I could think about but there was never really something that felt right, that felt genuine instead of just telling do’s and don’ts. 

And then I found your website and read your pieces about sleeping and eating. I carefully read through your schedules and decided to try it.

IT WORKED!! 

And within a week or two our little girl changed from a frustrated baby into this happy dappy smiling ray of sunshine, that is able to settle herself down by sucking on her fists, even in the middle of the night. At 12 weeks baby girl slept through the night and now at 20 weeks old she sleeps a good 10 to 12 hours every night. 

I just wanted to thank you for sharing your experience online. The way you wrote your experiences made it understandable, seeing it from the babys side but also the moms side. Maybe we were lucky that your way fitted our baby, but it worked and I tell it to everyone that wants to know!

Stephanie P.

“Had tremendous success from Day One!”

I just wanted to thank you for your sample routine.  I’ve been using it for a week with my 13 month old and had tremendous success from day 2! Wind down time is so important and so is consistency.  Thank you so much!!!

Sam M.

“In a few short days…”

I am grateful to have found your blog, as I do a great deal of searching on Pinterest when I am up against a parenting moment that I do not feel qualified to handle.

I will say though that since reading your blog I am really focusing on remembering that every moment is a learning \ experience for my son and I try to take a breath and count to ten. In the few short days that I have been exercising this method I truly have noticed a change for the better in his response to me.

Tami K.

Comments

  1. Aminah says

    Hi Rachel! THANK YOU for all this info ! I have a 4 week old baby boy (my first) and I was wondering whether you recommend swaddling before the last feed of the evening or after the feed?

    Thanks so much!

    • Rachel Norman says

      I swaddle before if it’s bedtime. Usually baby’ll kind of lazily go to sleep at the lat feed swaddled then I put him down :)

  2. Chelsea says

    During the day, where should the baby sleep? Not in a living room with the tv on and noises going on? Will he be able to know the difference between night and day if he’s always sleeping in a darker room with no noise?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Chelsea, once he knows the difference between night and day he’ll not ‘unknow’ it. Plus, as the baby gets older he’ll simpyl not be able to have a good nap with a lot of noise going on. Or rather an “angel baby” may but most children wont!

  3. My Bebe! says

    Great write up Rachel! Thanks so much for all this info! I have a 5week old baby boy (my first) and I recently tried some of the routines you mentioned and my little was fast asleep in not time!

    Thanks so much!

    • Rachel Norman says

      Oh that’s awesome :) Little ones are soo sweet!

  4. Jordan says

    Hi Rachel,

    If baby’s (6 months old) bedtime is around 830 with the 8 or before, when do you suggest starting the bedtime routine? I have found myself finishing the routine too fast and he’s not sleepy enough! Also, what time would you suggest feeding him solids if bedtime is aroune 8/830?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Hmm, do you read? I’d probably say 20 minutes is way long enough for a baby!

  5. Erin says

    We have a 5 week old and we were putting her down around 9:30 because she’s very tired then since she fights naps all during the day. Plus it was allowing us to get to bed early. She wakes then typical around 2:00 and then around 5:00-6:00 and sometimes has a hard time going back down or this second sleep seems more restless for her. Should we be giving her a dream feed at 11:00 and then hoping she goes longer into the early morning?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Erin, yes I ALWAYS recommend dream feed.

  6. Amanda says

    My 5 week old is taking little naps. He’ll sleep for 30 minutes during the day then wake up. He’s fussy, so I know he hasn’t slept long enough. What would you do?

    • Rachel Norman says

      I would from the start of a feed until you put him down not let more than an hour go by. Will he eat well and burp well?

      • Emma says

        Hi Rachel, I’m having a similar challenge baby is 8 months, she falls asleep nursing and doesn’t burp once she’s asleep… she’s awaken trying to relieve the gas and stirs for a while then eventually wakes up. Any suggestions please?

      • Rachel Norman says

        Emma, can you burp her while shes sort of half asleep? Can you pick her up, rest her on your shoulder so that the gas may get out?

      • Emma says

        Hi Rachel, I’m able to about 30% of the time if she’s sleeping, however the other 70% she’d wake herself up trying to force the gas out.

  7. Laurie-Anne says

    Hi, I have a six weeks old. She sleeps well at night, but during the day, she sakés-up as soon as her first 30-45 minutes of sleep is over… We’ve tried pretty much everything to help fall back asleep on her own and It’s not working… With two older (but still young!) children, It’s not very easy 😛
    She has a pacifier, but it dosent help when she awakes during the day… I have not been Through this with my others, any suggestions?
    Thank you :-)
    Ah and Yes, she is full, burps well and when she cries, it is obvious she is still sleepy…

    • Rachel Norman says

      I wonder if she’s experiencing the 45 minute intruder… When you *start* feeding , say, at 11:00 am, what time after that do you put her down to sleep? Noon? I only ask because maybe she could do with a tad less or more awake time. They say around 50 minutes to 70 is enough awake time for a little bitty one

  8. Jana says

    Hi I am wondering where you received the photo of the baby in the blue swaddle on this page?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Hi there, I buy some of the photos (some are my own) from a licensed photo distributor on Adobe Stock. Hope that helps :)

  9. Kalina says

    Should you try to feed baby before starting this routine?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Kalina, if you need to do a cluster feed then feed before and after or anywhere you want! I often try to feed last thing before bed, after wind down, to just get one more bit of milk in the belly.

  10. Heidi says

    My little guy still won’t fall asleep until he as at the breast…otherwise he will just stay awake and then gets super fussy. The second he has boob, he goes to sleep. I don’t mind, but if I am not back from work in time, then my husband has to deal with a fussy baby. Also, he is not interested in pacifiers :( Any suggestions? Thank you so much!

    • Rachel Norman says

      Heidi, I would not let him have a half feed, I’d try to encourage a FULL feed meaning keeping him awake so he’ll take a full feed. He’ll never sleep well if he’s always a quarter full! HOpe that helps :)

  11. Lara says

    Hi, I am not sure should I change my baby’s diaper before or after I feed him. He usually cries when I change it. I am right now change before I feed because I don’t wanna wake him up after I feed him. Is it correct?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Yes, that’s what I Do!

  12. Karina says

    Hello, I have tried many of these routines since baby was 2 months he has a bed routine he hrs to sleep in his crib with no problem around 8 or 8:30pm however he sometimes wakes at 12 than at 2 than 5 than 6 I do not feed him all those times I’m trying to help him sleep longer he was waking once st 3 am than 6 but idk what happen after 4 month he is now 5. He sucks at napping takes about 4 30 min cat naps a day! I truly have tried everything 😩 Purchase books oils everything

    • Rachel Norman says

      Karina, does he take full feeds multiple times throughout the day? If he wakes up regularly all night, what is he waking for? You or milk?

  13. Laura says

    Hi! I have a 4 week old and was wondering if during the 7:30-8:00 pm – change diaper, put to bed for the night part of the schedule I should also be feeding her. I know you recommend feeding whenever the child is hungry but wanted to know if a feed was included in this part of the night. Thank you!

    • Rachel Norman says

      Yes, definitely a feed here. That’s what I do anyway :)

  14. Ariel says

    Thanks so much for this article. My 3 week old eats, burps and goes back to sleep easily during the night but during the day he fights his naps. I follow the same routine, eat, burp, change diaper (and a few mins of play), but when I swaddle him and put him down, he just lies there with his eyes wide open and then eventually screams and cries. I feel like he is overtired and wants to sleep, but I can’t get him to go down. Any suggestions? If he gets overtired, what can I do to help him wind down again?

    • Rachel Norman says

      Ariel, how long does he stare off and how long does he cry before he goes down?

Hey y'all, I'm Rachel Norman, BA, MS, Language of Listening® parenting coach, mother to 5 babies in 5 years on 3 continents, no multiples. Join me in parenting without losing your mind. Read More >>

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The top 3 reasons babies don't sleep (and the solutions!)

- The #1 thing you should do when baby isn't napping or sleeping well


- The way to get baby to go to sleep and wake up at the same times every day (it's so effective it's hard not to call this a "trick")


- The process for changing unhelpful habits to healthy ones, step-by-step

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The top 3 reasons babies don't sleep well (and the solutions!)

- The #1 thing you should do when baby isn't napping well


- How to get baby to go to sleep and wake up at the same times every day (and this means way after 5 a.m.)


- The step-by-step process for changing unhelpful habits to healthy ones​

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