Here are some chores for toddlers and preschoolers they can do independently which will help teach life skills and confidence.
If you’ve got toddlers and preschoolers you know it can get overwhelming meeting all their needs all day long.
It’s a privilege, but it makes for a super tired mom. Here are some things you’re probably doing for your kids that you can stop.
As a mother of four kids, the oldest will turn 4 years old this week, some of the best advice I’ve ever received was to not do for your kids what they can do on their own.
I’m telling you, I internalized this early.
It is fairly easy to do every single thing for one child and even two, but the more kids you have the more you realize that you don’t have the time to do every little thing.
Nor should you!
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
Kids actually enjoy accomplishing tasks on their own. It’s why I make sure there are plenty of Chores for Toddlers to do around here.
One of my children’s favorite phrases said with joy and a huge smile is, “Look mom, I did it by muhself!” I’m here to tell you, it brings me as much joy as it brings them.
➡️ While this is not an exhaustive list, here are things that I allow (and sometimes require, depending on the situation) my children to do on their own as soon as they are able.
You may think some of these are nuts, but it works for us. Remember, however, it isn’t a problem unless it’s a problem for you.
What's in this post...
Tasks, jobs, & chores for toddlers & preschoolers
When you first move into having some chores for your toddlers around the house, you’ll be right there with them most of the time.
As they get bigger and more used to it, however, they may want to run off and do it a bit without as much of your help.
- Clean up their toys. When they take toys out, they put them back. This sometimes needs a bit of sidewalk supervising so they aren’t overwhelmed, but they catch on quickly. (Read: Tidy Routines That Work)
- Pick out their clothes. Their clothes are in drawers they can reach and I will instruct them to pick them out. It doesn’t always work nor will I always ask them to do it, but they seem to enjoy it. (Read: Downsizing Kid Clothes)
- Get dressed. I have one child who always wants to dress herself, and another who makes the biggest deal about it. He gives one attempt at putting his arm through the hole then falls backwards and whines, “I can’t, mommy!” Because of this we really try to focus on helping him persevere. I’ll stand beside him and guide him, but he feels so victorious when he’s done it so I try to let him even if it takes 5 minutes.
These checklists include all the tasks that need to be done in various rooms so that your little one can use pictures or text to help them complete a group of chores in one area.
Learn MoreThese chores help toddlers build independence
One of the biggest benefits of chores for toddlers and preschoolers is they learn to help out from an early age so there’s never any “I’m not used to this” and refusing to do it going on.
- Take off their clothes. Before bath, I ask mine to take off their own clothes. Sometimes they can and sometimes they can’t depending on the fit of the outfit, but they give it a go.
- Put dirty clothes away. We have a laundry basket in every child’s room. Our laundry basket is in the hallway and I will remind them (they do always need reminding) to put their clothes in the laundry basket after they’ve taken them off. (Video: Our Awesome Laundry System)
- Help fix their own sandwich. My kids like to spread their own jelly and peanut butter. I will say this is largely an exercise in frustration for the younger one, but they try and I let them.
- Put their plates in the sink. After the kids have eaten they are always to clear their own area. So they’ll put their cups and plates either in the sink (if it’s plastic), beside the sink (if it’s glass), or in the trash (if it’s disposable). And without being told they know which is which and don’t break anything!
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
These chores help mom out
- Get their own water. Some refrigerators give you access to water within arm’s reach which is good. You can magnetize a cup or clip them on the refrigerator too. Ours does not, however, and my kids will push a stool (sometimes 5 feet) to the kitchen sink. Climb the stool, fill their cup, climb down, push the stool back, then drink their water. Honestly. And they smile the whole time.
- Empty the dishwasher. If they are old enough to be careful and don’t have to carry plates and glasses far, I think emptying the dishwasher with some supervision is totally possible.Â
- Wipe their area. Kids make a mess while eating often times and that’s okay. I can’t pay close attention to every mouthful of my kids so after they’re done eating we’ll pass them a wet rag and let them wipe it up. It isn’t perfect, but it communicates to leave an area clean.
- Bathe themselves. I’m not saying leave them in the bath alone at all. But as they are in the bath and playing you can let them begin to wash. Of course, you’ll have to go behind them to make sure it’s all clean if they didn’t get in all the right places, but mine also like to have control over where the soap goes since they don’t want it in their eyes.
- Brush their teeth. Again, I go behind them and touch up any brushing or get the hard-to-reach back places, but we always let them have a go first. I want them to feel independent and capable of self-care tasks, and they generally don’t mind if I “make sure we got it all” after they’re done. (Read: Guaranteed Wind Down Routines)
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
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Some life skills that double as chores
- Turn on and off their night lights and white noise. With small ones you can’t guarantee silence throughout the night so, in an attempt to prevent everyone from waking if one wakes, I have some type of white noise in their rooms. Two have old (and I mean old) radios on FM static, one uses a white noise app on the tablet, and one uses a white noise app on my phone. (Read: 10 Reasons Your Baby Can’t Sleep)
- Make their bed. Mine aren’t able to actually fix their sheets and comforters, but I fold those and then they straighten their pillows and toys.
- Fold towels. My daughter is pretty good at folding towels. When we’re folding laundry I’ll separate the towels and smaller blankets for her to fold. They aren’t perfect but remember Type A mom, they don’t have to be!
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
Life skills kids can do
- Get in and out of the car and into their car seat. I’m sure this started when I had my third child and he was on my hip, but for as long as I can remember I’ve had my kids climb into the car on their own and sit in their seats. And this is in a minivan and a big pickup truck. Ha. They love it. It takes a bit more time as you can imagine, but it’s worth it for me and makes me dread errands a tad less. (See: My funny toddler carseat meme)
- Walk beside the shopping cart. I simply can’t put all my kids in the cart and actually get food into it. And I tell you if all the kids are with me then you know I must have been in some dire need of food. My 3 and 2 year olds will both walk beside the shopping cart throughout grocery shopping. Or really sometimes they’ll hang on to the sides and ride, but they do not have to be in it. (Read: How to run errands with small kids and not regret it)
- Walk instead of ride in the stroller. Again, I discovered this out of necessity, but once my kids turn 2 they pretty much don’t get to ride in the stroller. Sorry not sorry. Double strollers can get super heavy and hard to push, particularly postpartum. We’ve walked all over major cities, through parks, done a 5k, been sightseeing, and run errands with the little ones walking. Of course I’ll stop and hold them or give them a break if they complained but you know what? They never ever do.
Okay I could go on, but the list is getting long and plus I’d love to hear from you.
Get 101+ chore cards to help your little one build life skills, confidence, and their hard work muscles.
Learn MoreSources:
- Involving kids in household tasks has a positive impact later in life
- Chores are associated with self-competence, self-efficacy, and prosocial behavior
- Longitudinal Harvard study shows chores are bigger predictor of good mental health as an adult (moreso than social class, family problems, and other factors)
FAQs
If teaching your kids to do things independently is new for your family, find the part of the day that you dread the most or feels the most chaotic. Then, find things that your kids can do during that time to make things easier for you. It will be more work at the beginning as you teach them how to do things independently but it will pay off in the long run.
Start small and observe what works and what doesn’t for your child and your family. As your child begins to do a few things independently, evaluate how they’re doing and if you want to add more tasks or not.
I love this post! My young two-year-old does a number of the things on this list, and when she complains that something is hard to do, I will spend five minutes coaching her through it instead of doing it for her in five seconds, because I’m of the “teach a man to fish” school of thought. Most of all, I love the excitement on her face when she finally gets it without me having actually helped her other than explaining what needs done. You’re right that it would probably not be too hard to do everything for her at this point, but we want a big family so I’m planning ahead! One thing I taught her a few months ago that is AWESOME is that when we come inside, she’s to take off her shoes and jacket, and rather than leaving them by the door, put her shoes away in the correct place under her bed and hang her jacket on the door knob so I can hang it in the closet later. She also often puts away her own laundry into the correct drawers, slices her bananas with a butter knife, etc. Oh–and shortly after she turned two, I decided to ditch the potty chair and toilet seat adapter and just have her climb up and perch carefully on the regular toilet seat to go potty so that I didn’t have to empty and sanitize her potty all the time. This saves me lots of time and grossness! :)
Absolutely love these additions, Melissa! YES. I like that about putting things up inside the door when coming home, too, because that’s often the type of messes that are big. When everyone comes in and throws stuff down. I have to do a lot of coaching with one of mine but it’s so honestly worth it! Totally with you on the teach a man to fish school of thought.
I love this list! I just wish I knew how to implement it. Like dressing; she’s perfectly capable and will do it randomly, but many mornings she just doesn’t want to. She will opt to not have breakfast simply so she can not dress…. I thought saying she can’t have breakfast before she dresses would moivate her…
Jessie, WHY DO THEY NOT WANT TO PUT CLOTHES ON!! I will tell you my 4 year old (turned 4 today) prefers pajamas. I honestly don’t fight it every day, but when we DO need to get dressed I’ll make her. Ha.
I like this about what our 2-3 year olds can do. Mine also lay the table and say the prayer for the meals! Really quite cute! Our 2 year old has also learned to feed herself earlier than her brother who is now 3 did! Thanks for the tips!
Wanjiru, thanks about setting the table. That’s a great idea actually, we don’t do that yet. We sing our prayers :)
Just read this with my newly 3 year old. You know, the whole, “See mommy’s not the only one who says you are old enough to do this.” : ) He was very excited to know he’d been doing these things for a while.
Yes Brandi!!! Go on with it, ha. My mom said “You’re gonna make my grandbaby do that…” one time about something and I said, “Hey, yes, unless you want to continue doing it for the next few years.” Ha :)
My daughter ( who will be 3 next month) goes into the fridge in the morning and gets her yogurt, the drinkable kind, goes into the cabinet for a straw, pokes it in the hole herself and there’s breakfast! She’s been doing this for months and it’s a huge help while I’m nursing the baby in the morning!
Stacy that is AWESOME. Actually, I think I need to move some stuff around in our pantry to allow this to happen because that morning nursing period is tough. A baby wants to feed, the other kids want to eat and you only have so much time. Good tip!
Yay I’m glad I could give YOU a helpful tip lol!! I also wanted to add that I think giving them a little freedom to “choose” from the fridge by themselves is a great thing to help their confidence and makes them feel so proud. My daughter never tries going into the fridge for other things besides what she knows she’s allowed to have. I think this is partly due to letting her have that little bit of freedom :)
That’s a good idea actually! Mine have yet to try to go in the fridge, but when they do I will remember that!
Thanks Rachel for this post! It came with perfect timing! I’ve been at a crossroads with my just turned 3yr. old, and was realizing that he really is capable of a whole lot more than I gave him credit for :) Yesterday for the first time he folded his own and little brothers pants and also washcloths, and he was soooo proud of himself! It makes him so much happier if he can help work.
You are so right, they actually LIKE to feel accomplished. Here we are getting frazzled doing things for them when they’re happy to. Ha!
My two oldest kiddos (now aged 4 and 2 1/2) do many of these things too! Yay!
A few weeks ago I realized that I had slacked off on making them pick up their toys after playing with them. This meant that our main areas looked like a cyclone had hit after a couple hours of playtime! It was just so much faster for me to pick the toys up than to make the kids pick up. And then, when I’d try to encourage them to pick up, it was incredibly tedious work, and I was frustrated because it felt like the kiddos were just lazy or not obedient or whatever.
My husband observed all this and noted that perhaps we had never really trained them what it meant to clean up. So he took the oldest under his wing and spent perhaps 20 minutes working with Duplo blocks. “Here is how you clean up. You pick up a block in your hand, then move your hand over to the bucket, and drop the block in. Should you play with the blocks? No. Should you put blocks together? No. Just pick up the block, move your hand over the bucket, and drop it in. And you keep doing it until all the Duplos are picked up.” All very lovingly and patiently, of course.
Well, my son “got” it. Over the next few days, I helped both older kids identify what needed to be picked up in a room and then assigned particular groups of toys (one picks up trains and the other picks up track, for example). We would race to see who could pick up their group first. Now both kids get it! Like, at least three times in the last week the living room has been strewn with matchbox cars, trains, little plastic animals and trees, and various other books and toys and I have heard the kids talking amongst themselves to figure out who should pick up what. And I have come into that room later and EVERYTHING is cleaned up! It’s beautiful. Gives me a complete and total boost.
So, skill training was what was needed. :)
Well, I’ve rambled there! But I wanted to add this:
My husband is now a supervisor at work and has been going through supervisor training. Often there are supervisees who have trouble following orders. My husband is being trained to ask these questions in that case: 1) are my expectations clear? and 2) does this person have the necessary skills and resources to complete this task? (There was another question but I can’t remember it right now). Anyway, this really applies to our kiddos. In the case of the failure to pick up, my husband identified that the kids hadn’t been given the skill of picking up, and proceeded to train them in that. Wow! What I thought was a character problem (obedience, laziness) was just a lack of skill. So now I’m trying to remember those questions when it seems like the kiddos should know what to do and aren’t following directions, whether it’s picking up, or coloring a picture, or eating neatly. Maybe I need to slow down and train them in the needed skill. And giving them these skills will help them throughout their lives!
Thanks so much for posting this because it’s so true. I’ve found that too, that sometimes it isn’t they are trying NOT to do what we say, but that they aren’t quite sure what we want. “Clean up” is clear to us, but can be overwhelming when faced with a big fat mess. Great points here, Christy!
Great post! My boy is 20 months old. He is capable of doing many interesting things. He puts forks and spoons in the dishwasher, wipes floor as water or milk pours, throws used tissue papers in the recycle bin, and even brings garbage to the door. However, the cutest is his expertise in peeling onions. I am from iran, we use onion in most foods, and he is a great help to me.
How cute about the onions. Do his eyes water? Ha!
My 3.5 year old loves to vacuum and mop. He begs to clean the toilet and the bathroom sink. I follow up to make sure the details are done right but he gets the first go at it. He also likes to help pull weeds in the garden and water the plants.
I’ve heard very young ones can pull weeds, glad you confirmed! Ha :)
I love your lists! My 3 years old is doing most listed, and she loves it very much! She will take dirty plates and drop into sink (only if reminded), she will offer to wipe spills (always see me doing that), will offer to clean table after making a cake (always see me doing that), put het clothes into laundry basket(need reminder), brush her teeth, gargle and spit (she will spend 30min gargling if i allow), pick her own clothing, return toys (if i do it with her) and so on. I always believe we go with the pace of the child, if she is not ready, dont force it but if she is or at least want to try, let her! You will be amaze on how determine she is to complete the chore only if she is given a chance to!
Jennie, I am so with you on this. I often see what they start and help them finish. It’s about having them feel they are able and then letting them do it. I think it works wonders!
Mt 2yo empties the dishwasher with me he is very carefull! He puts his clothes right away in the washing machine, adds our clothes from the basket and fills it with the powder (under my supervision). He empties little trash bins from the rooms into the big trashbin and tries to help washing the dishes near me on his stool, but its actually only a mess and playing with water :)
I like your ideas!!
Great ideas! I love when they help :)
I like this list a lot and I also think it is important to add that you much take time for training. You likely do a great job of showing them how to do these things and then allowing them to practice. I wouldn’t want someone to read this and think that your children were able to do any of these things if you hadn’t shown them how to. I am compiling a list for my parents in my preschool classroom… many of the 3’s are still not doing lots of these things.
One thing that I did to help our kids when they were younger and tended to get overwhelmed by a big toy mess was to print pictures of the kinds of toys that they had – Duplo, matchbox cars, books, etc. – focusing on things that had a variety of pieces. I glued each picture onto an index card. They would put away all the toys on an index card, and then go on to another card. Once they had gone through all of the cards in this way, the random single toys that were left were relatively few and easy for them to put away.