Need help narrowing down the specific life skills needed to teach gratitude? These 5 simple concepts will cause gratitude, not entitlement in your kids:
Life skills are not just chores. They aren’t just sweeping, doing the dishes, or mopping.
Life skills are things we need to know to help up life a fulfilling- more successful life. These are the things we need to pass on to our kids.
So, in honor of Thanksgiving, we’re going to talk about life skills that cause gratitude, not entitlement.
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
What's in this post...
There are six main categories of life skills:
- Finances
- Personal Care
- Health & Safety
- Self-Management
- Chores
- Relationships & Community
Within these different categories, there are a lot of different skills we can teach our kids to help them be grateful.
Being grateful is a big deal! It contributes to life happiness, contentless, being more thankful, having less strife, and avoiding selfish ambition.
For children under our roof, entitlement can be very difficult to deal with. We don’t want to see this in our kids. Furthermore, we don’t want to send out kids our into the world as spoiled little brats.
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
Learn MoreHere are 5 Life Skills that Cause Gratitude, Not Entitlement:
Finance
We need to make sure that our children are not “spoiled for choice.” This skill is a skill that mothers need to have.
I learned this when I lived in England. My husband is Austrailain and they said this as well. Kids don’t appreciate their options when they are spoiled.
Kids may have an “assembly line” of super expensive toys that they got for Christmas, but complain about having nothing to do.
We need to exercise this financial life skill. Our kids are “spoiled by choice” when we give them too much. Entitlement, not gratitude comes from being spoiled.
Think about going into a restaurant where the menu is so massive that we can’t decide what to eat. Looking at it makes us sort of loose our appetite. Our reaction is to check out and head to McDonalds or Taco Bell.
When we give endlessly, our kids don’t appreciate any of it. It’s hard for them to dig in when they are spoiled.
Furthermore, when kids are spoiled, they just don’t appreciate what they have and this leads to entitlement. I advocate that the best toys we can give our kids is dress up clothes.
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
Practicing Their Manners
This is from the Relationships and Community life skill category.
Practicing their manners is…
- saying, “Please and thank you,”
- being polite,
- not interrupting,
- learning to be considerate of others, and
- learning to voice their needs and wants while thinking of other people.
I’m gong to be honest. I’m an interrupter. How do I know this? I know it because all of the sudden I looked up and realized that I had raised five kids who all interrupt. It was a distressing realization. I had taught them how to do this.
Dinnertime had become an absolute nightmare because everyone was constantly talking over everybody. So, we introduced a “talking stick.”
We had to get out a talking stick. It worked for a little while until we got the hang of waiting. However, I started to realize something. I realized that the kids didn’t always have something important to say, they just liked to be the one talking.
This wake-up call made us realize that they were only thinking about themselves.
First of all, using manners prevents entitlement because it forces kids to think about other people. Secondly, it trains them to think of others when they are forced to respond to others politely.
Practicing manners builds gratitude, not entitlement.
You don’t want them to “thrown” into the deep end of life without knowing the life skills necessary to succeed. Life School At Home is is great resource that will help equip your kids for life. It’s incremental lessons that aren’t overwhelming (to us or them) on the life skills necessary to succeed in life.
Read: Life Skills That Thanksgiving Teaches Kids
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
Learn MoreSelf-Awarness & The Ability to Think
Self-awareness and the ability to think falls into the self-management category. Let’s be honest, not everyone “thinks” and self-awareness is huge. Let me explain…
Our feelings get hurt. We’re anxious, depressed… or whatever. This results in us simmering inside. Unfortunately, this leads to us being rude to other people or short tempered.
Because we need to focus on whatever is happening inside of us, we can become over self-focused. When we ignore our needs, we actually become more selfish.
Neglecting your own physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional needs for so long―in an effort to be a selfless mother―leaves you depleted. Being well blesses your family! Learn WIN WIN strategies in my upcoming book!
Learn MoreOn the same thought, we have a habit of ignoring how we feel. We tend to bury our feelings. As a result, we can become over self-focused. This is human nature…
However, practicing self-awareness can help us process though these things. It will lead us to be more content, grateful, and aware of our needs.
How does this relate to our kids? We can teach our kids to…
- Express how they feel verbally.
- Explain what their frustrations are in calm ways.
- Think about how they are feeling.
- Brainstorm about what they need to do to fix it.
- Express needing help or support from mom.
Here’s a pro-tip: If your kids ever do something that seems weird or “off” it’s because you don’t have the info.
In conclusion, kids will be calmer when taught to think about their situation. Kids are more apt to know how to ask for help when they are taught self-awareness.
Self-awareness leads to kids being less selfish and entitled.
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
Work Ethic
Work ethic falls into the Chore category of life skills. That’s right- this is an obvious one! Life skills training would not be complete without talking about work ethic.
Times change, work changes, life changes…
However, work ethic is when you’re able to do the things that need to be done. It is doing the job no matter how you feel.
We can train our kids to…
- do hard things even when it feels annoying, and
- push through the resistance of things they don’t want to do.
Work ethic is a huge life skill. It’s one of the most important things to learn.
One of the hardest parts of being an adult is doing the things we don’t want to do. It ain’t easy for mama. Likewise, it ain’t easy for the kids.
The sooner kids learn work ethic, the better off they are. We want them to be content with the things they like to do. The key is – it has to be done.
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
Learn MoreIf we never ask them to do anything, but when we do they melt down…
- It’s a sign that they need to be doing more work.
- They need more chores.
- They may even need things taken away from them.
Keep it simple. You don’t have to drum up a bunch of weird stuff. Have the kids help you with the daily necessities. Allow them to help you in the things you’re already doing.
The sooner kids get used to just getting done what needs to be done without hullabaloo, the calmer and more peaceful they are.
Let the kids help. They can practice work ethic on the normal things that need to be done. This will help prevent them from feeling entitled to have everything done for them.
Learn to Take Responsibility
Learning responsibility will help kids take on a spirit of gratitude, not entitlement. It’s also in the Self-Management category of life skills. Kids need to learn to take responsibility for themselves.
First of all, this doesn’t mean that we are requiring things from them that are not age appropriate. Likewise, this doesn’t mean that we stop doing things for them.
We love our babies and we want to do lots for them. However, taking responsibility for yourself is a huge thing.
Taking responsibility has a domino effect on a person’s life. Once it’s in order, it ripples down and fixes a lot of things in life.
Unfortunately, kids can learn to blame others for their actions.
- I didn’t do my homework because my brother was talking to me.
- I forgot my planner at school because the class was too loud.
- My sister was messing with me so I couldn’t finish sweeping the floor.
- Etc…
We should teach our kids to take responsibility for themselves. This includes admitting if they messed up. Sometimes it’s admitting what is their job and what isn’t.
For example, if you’ve tasked your kids with cleaning their room daily, you’ve got to hold to that boundary. You say, “you didn’t do the thing that you were supposed to do so you can’t do movie night.” They may complain and say, “you didn’t remind me.” Well, you can teach them that it’s within their responsibility to remember what they have to get done.
We can teach our kids that remembering is still within their responsibility. If we forget to do our job, that was still something that we did.
This isn’t shaming or heaping condemnation on them. It’s simply saying, “It was your job and you didn’t do it… so go get it done.” That’s it.
Check off critical household, social, and hygiene skills for your child so they’re prepared (not petrified) of growing up!
Carrying Responsibility Isn’t a Burden
It’s worth noting that responsibility isn’t too heavy for the shoulders of your kids. In fact, it feels right. The things that are right, good, and true might be difficult. However, they aren’t heavy or unnatural. They are right.
It’s best if we help our children from a young age learn life skills in the Self-Management category. We can teach them how to know what their responsibilities are.
Here’s the truth- kids will “fab off” their their responsibility on other people if they are given the opportunity to do so. As humans, we naturally take the path of least resistance. It feels better to blame others rather than take responsibility.
Make it an effort to help teach our kids to to be responsible. When this happens, they begin to be grateful for the things they have.
- If they work for something, it is appropriated more.
- Working, saving, and purchasing something is a huge lesson for them to absorb. This is true especially if they are less than satisfied with what they got.
In conclusion, we don’t want our kids to feel entitled. We don’t want them to blame everyone else for their problems. So, we need to get bust on teaching them some of these life skills.
Neglecting your own physical, spiritual, mental, and emotional needs for so long―in an effort to be a selfless mother―leaves you depleted. Being well blesses your family! Learn WIN WIN strategies in my upcoming book!
Learn MoreFAQs
Take one at a time and intentionally talk to your kids about it. Explain what it means, how you want them to practice it, and then expect them to use the skill when appropriate. I walk mamas through teaching their kids life skills in Life School at Home!
Yes, mama, I hear you. Don’t overwhelm yourself because if it feels daunting you are less likely to carry it through. Start with simple steps –  make a list of life skills (2 or 3 max to start) and make a simple plan to explain, equip and expect the skills from your kids.
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