Independent play time is one of the most important parts of your toddler or preschooler’s day. It helps teach independence, focus, and heaps more.
One of the best pieces of parenting advice I’ve ever applied was giving your child independent playtime each day.
Independent playtime is, as the name suggests, a time where the baby/toddler/child plays in a safe area alone for a certain period of time determined by you.
Babies may be on a play mat or in a pack-n-play while toddlers and children can be in their crib or room.
When they are young it will be for a short period of time. By around 18 months they will be able to happily play alone for 45 minutes to an hour.
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I know because my children do it.
This single activity in my schedule allows me to do things like clean, work, check emails, rest, get dressed and simply to have a few moments to myself.
Read: 8 Useful Ways To Use The Pack & Play (They Might Surprise You)
And, it’s not primarily for you, it’s great for them too.
You’ll never regret setting aside time each day to let your kids learn to entertain themselves.
Why Independent Play Times Are Great For Toddlers And Preschoolers
They learn problem solving + cause and effect
If the toy is stuck, they try to get it out.
They throw their doll out of their reach and now they are one doll down.
And they stack those blocks in frustration until they learn to balance them well.
This is a time where they explore – on their own without your hovering or interruption – a little bit about life. Instead of everything happening to them (ie, when family members play with them and take them around, give them toys, etc.) this is a time where they determine their own course.
Some days I find my girl sitting with 30 books around her Quietly Reading, pointing, and laughing.
- Your child directs their own play and problem solves.
- Your child learns to first attempt something before asking for help.
Read: Excellent Books For Kids & Moms
Learn how to do a 30 minute, 1x a week strategic play session at home with your child to help them process their life through play and build a strong connection with you.
Learn More
I remember one day hearing a distressed shout and went into my 2 year old daughter’s room to find she’d climbed onto a (fairly low) storage container and got stuck.
She called for me and I came to the rescue… but she didn’t climb on it again.
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Toddler independent play teaches lessons
She learned her own lesson. Instead of us constantly solving their problems and making things simple, this is a time where they can start to figure out their surroundings and take control of a small area, if only for a short time.
Additionally, problem solving and decision making increases self-confidence in children. When they see a problem and find a solution to their liking, they feel encouraged in their own abilities.
If they must constantly look to you for intervention, this confidence in their own ability is stunted.
Read: 7 Phrases To Encourage Independence In Toddlers & Preschoolers
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
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Independent Play Encourages And Breeds Imagination
My grandmother said it best.
“Boring people get bored.”
Your child needs a chance to work their imagination because it is crucial for future problem solving and decision-making skills.
If we as mothers over hover, they aren’t left with the time and space to go into their own mind and make up a fun world.
Read: Life Skills For Kids By Age (With Printables!)
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Toddler And Preschooler Playing On Their Own Increases Creativity
Dolls become friends and rugs become race tracks. I don’t leave too many toys around, and this urges the kids to really dig into whatever they’re doing. I hear them laugh, talk, babble or sing and move around.
And I can see them trying new things, fitting blocks into holes and stacking things around. I believe this is a time that encourages them to explore and discover a little without us.
- Make sure there aren’t any choking hazards in the independent play area.
- Have toys available and watch to see how your child reacts. If they bounce from toy to toy and get bored easily, try removing some toys. This avoids distraction and helps them focus.
Read: 5 Problems Toy Rotation Solves
Independent Structured Play Creates Routine, Discipline, & Security
Many mothers think that simply being near their child will bring security.
While this is true in a sense (constant absence of a parent surely does bring insecurity and fear), the test of whether a child is secure or not is when the mother walks away.
If a mother walks away and the child goes into hysterics then there is obviously less security than previously thought.
Independent play is one way to build a sense of security and confidence that will last. The child knows they will play alone and knows you will come back.
Read: Therapeutic Play: How To Do It At Home For Your Kids
Learn how to do a 30 minute, 1x a week strategic play session at home with your child to help them process their life through play and build a strong connection with you.
Learn MorePlaying On Their Own Helps Them Grow In Independence
I go into their room with them and we play together for a minute or two. Then I may put a basket of toys in the crib for my 16 month-old. Get out some paper and crayons for my 3-year-old, or put out some puzzles and toys for my 2-year-old.
As I leave, 9 times out of 10 they will say “bye bye mommy” with a big smile. 45 minutes to an hour later I come back and we are all happily reunited and play together again.
Get my cheat sheets and find your family’s groove. Chore, independent play, meal, nap, bedtime, and MORE routine ideas!
Related Reads:
- Age Appropriate Toys For Independent Play
- A Surprising Reason Our Kids Are Insecure
- 5 Handy Things Mothers Of Preschoolers Should Do
Independent Play Times Teach Kids To Entertain Themselves
If I am out shopping and run into a friend I will stop and talk.
People frequently comment how calm they are and – while they have their fair share of hyperactivity – they are able to cope when I am occupied. I find this extremely helpful.
Truly, if you have many children, this time is actually a gift to them. Unless you have three of everything for your three children, the kids will spend part of their day trying to claim toys as their territory.
By having alone playtime, children do not have to compete for or worry about others stealing their fun. I often rotate the toys in each child’s room so they aren’t bored with the same toys.
Read: 10 Ways To Keep Kids Busy When You Need To Get Stuff Done
Independent Play Is A Win-Win
Not only will your children enjoy this Rest Time to themselves (particularly if they have siblings with whom they must always share or protect their toys), but so will you!
You can use it to prep dinner, read a book, put up your feet, or anything else your heart desires. We have our playtime mid-morning when I am usually due for some peace and quiet.
Read: The Trick To Finding Alone Time As A Stay At Home Mom
Help prepare your kids for life, one skill at a time. Simple, easy skills every month!
Learn MoreHow To Start Doing Independent Play Times If Your Kids Are Resistant
It’s perfectly normal that your children resist playtime initially.
If they are 2 and have never been required to play on their own in their room, there may be tears or tantrums. That’s okay.
Tantrums aren’t always a bad thing.Â
The key is baby steps. Start small. My 3-year-old will play for one hour (longer if I let her) willingly each morning. She’s used to it and time flies when she’s having fun.
However, starting at 5 minutes or even 10 minutes is a safe bet. If they cry or resist, reassure them you are just in the other room and will return shortly.
Learn how to do a 30 minute, 1x a week strategic play session at home with your child to help them process their life through play and build a strong connection with you.
Learn MoreEventually – when they realize you will come back – they’ll turn away from the back of the door and begin playing. You can gradually increase the time they are in their rooms after they’ve gotten the hang of it.
Feel free to offer a drink or a snack (one that you aren’t worried will create a huge mess or be a choking hazard, obviously) to get them in the “mood.” If mine seem a bit testy, I’ll offer an enticing snack with the beginning of play time and that’s almost always enough for them to settle in to playing.
As always, be consistent.
When they expect play time each day, they are far more likely to be wiling participants than if you try to spring it on them just because you need a few minutes to yourself.
Make it a regular part of your routine or rhythm and be amazed at the results!
Read: How To Teach Kids To Play On Their Own
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FAQs
I try to offer as many open-ended options for my kids to play with as possible, so less is more. We want to encourage critical thinking and creativity so providing fewer toys that can be used in multiple ways is the best option. For toddlers, try starting with 3-4 options and adjust accordingly depending on how your child does.
Independent play time can become your toddler’s rest time when they are ready to fully drop naps. If a child still occasionally naps during rest time, independent play time during a different time of the day can still be helpful so they have time to play and nap. When young kids are used to independent play time, it can be an easier transition to rest time when they drop their nap.
Hi Rachel,
I love this idea! My son is 2 1/2 and I have an 8 month old girl. Is it too late to start with him? When should I start this with my daughter? I don’t want it to be mistaken for nap-time.
Andrea it’s NEVER TOO LATE! With your daughter, I feel you, sometimes they think it’s nap time but for her what I’d do is put her in the playpen/crib, etc. in a very well lit area with toys and only for a short period of time when it’s NOT right before nap time. Ha. Perhaps right after she wakes up from a nap? And for your son, start with small increments because he might fuss the first few times until he understands!
Thank you for your response Rachel. I’m going to try to implement this. I’m working on developing a more concrete schedule to follow along with it. We already do well with naps and bedtime, but more structured activities during the day may be helpful in keeping him busy and out of trouble!
Andrea, I find that a few slots of structured time more than make up for lots of free time. Free time is great, but when it gets out of hand, a few structured things really make the day break up into small doable parts :)
Hi Rachel
So this has been a life-changer for us, my 3 yr old does an hour of room time each morning. For a long time it’s been during my 1 year olds morning nap. She is transitioning out of that morning nap and just a long afternoon. So thinking of having them both do their room time in the morning at the same time. Should I start by putting her in a pack n play with toys for 5-10 minutes in another room?
Yes, that’s what I do. I use pack n play or the crib for little ones and I put them in separate rooms :) I will say when they are transitioning out of their morning nap independent play can be tricky because they often fall asleep. ha!
Hi Rachael
Just wanted to say well done on
Your website, parenting tips, and achievements as a mother of so many ! I myself struggled as a young and immature parent with not ideal role models as guidance
But learnt as I matured and through thoughtful analysis of different styles of parenting and a great book by Penelope Leach from the 70s or 80s caring for your baby 0-5yrs I have 6 children all grown now and healthy happy individuals thanks be to God ! My parenting style improved as the years have passed but was far from ideal at the beginning! I have to say your approach is brilliant very practical and effective and well thought out , if I was a young parent starting out I would definitely have benefited from your advice and help and indeed as a nanny now of two young children am finding useful tips! I agree that routine and consistency are key also allowing for individuality and emotions to be expressed but still following through with the routine while giving children some choices but in a way that works for you also. All my children learned to play on there own also and with little to no toys it really helps to enrich their imagination and creates confidence in their abilities, keep up the great advice you are an inspiration. Alison
My two older boys loved to play independently, but the youngest did not. The difference? the first two were strong introverts and the third was an extrovert and found being alone very hard. Poor kid he was the one extrovert in a family of introverts. I found it difficult to accept until I realized that it was a personality difference that was in play (no pun intended). At that point he was old enough that we could invite another child in for a playtime. They would play together and everyone was happy! Not quite independent play, but almost as good!
Sharon, that’s a great observation you made of your kids. And of course personality will have something to do with it, won’t it? I often let two of mine play together and you know what, when I’m not there, there is very rarely any bickering either!
Chanced upon your post while looking for quiet time activity for my years old. i agree that independent play is most important and it gives them space to explore and grow.
So true, Priya! Mine love it :)
Rachel,
Do you start this once they are down to one nap or younger than that? H is 12 months now and still on 2 naps. I was thinking this would be a good replacement to still give me some “mommy time” once we drop the morning nap.
I do it even before the morning nap is dropped but just for a shorter time. Picking a time is tricky though because if you put them in they’re crib to play they may fall asleep!
Will this work for children who are in day care Monday through Friday? Like, they could do independent play on Saturday and Sunday and get used to it, even if it doesn’t happen at day care?
I definitely think so, Jamie, it’ll just take a little longer to get used to it!
I know this is an old post but I’m hoping you still answer questions from old posts. :) I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and she’s always been pretty independent and able to entertain herself. We don’t have a specific independent play time but I’m very intrigued by the idea. My son (he just turned 1 two weeks ago) is VERY attached to me and has a hard time playing by himself. How much time would you suggest for a 1 year old to play independently? I’m a teacher so I work full-time and he’s an a daycare during the week.
Any advice?
Jenni, mine do about an hour a day! If he’s clingy then you’ll have to start small and give him incentive. Ha! I’d start with 10 minutes (unless he is content and you can go longer) and give him a snack of something easy so he’ll want to go and play. Or his favorite drink, etc. I’d put him in the crib (or playpen) and say i love you, huggy kissy, etc. and then walk out and maybe pull the door to. That way you can see him but he can’t see you. If he screams and wails and carries on then give him a bit of time to calm down adn if he doesn’t go back in and say “I’m here, but it’s play time!!” and try again. Don’t go on too long if he can’t cope. Then try again… I started late with my third but he got the hang of it in a few days and loves it now! :)
What if i have 2 boys that, beginning in August, will start sharing a room. How would you create independent play areas?
Karen, you could have one play in your room and the other in their room then switch the next day? Or you could do one to play at one time then after that the other? They don’t necessarily have to be in their own room for independent play. Or even one outside if it’s nice weather and you have an enclosed yard?
Thank you, thank you for writing about this. I have 2 kids (33 mo, and 16 mo, with another one on the way). My daughter who is almost 3 has suuuuch a hard time playing by herself because she’s very social. She will happily help me do the dishes, sweep the floor, mop, scramble eggs etc., as long as I’m there interacting with her. But if I need some alone time or need to do something that she can’t help with, it’s constant whining or trying to get involved. It’s exhausting.
Up until now the only semi-helpful advice I could find an activity they can do quietly by themselves (play-doh, coloring, or whatever), start it with them and then walk away. That sort of works with her, as long as I’m still in sight and she can still talk to me. Even still she intermittently asks me to come over and do it with her, and she is very persistent. TV immobilizes her, but it makes me sad to have her in front of the TV so much.
What’s worse is my son, who has a natural ability to play by himself and figure toys out, almost never gets the opportunity to because she is constantly in his business, bossing him around and taking toys away from him. She doesn’t take any naps any more (much to my horror and dismay, since I’m a big believer in naps and sleep routines), so none of us get a break until bed time. If other kids come over she will play with them happily without regard to where I am, and she has no problem going to our church nursery.
Anyway, I’m excited to try this method with my kids. I know it’s not that different than what others are saying, but the part about being truly inaccessible to them was like a light bulb going off in my head. It makes sense, especially with a kid like her, that they cannot see you or even get to you. Wish me luck!
And I SO FEEL YOU. I think little girls can be clingy towards their mamas (mine is) and while it’s so sweet it does wear on you.
Just wanted to come back and say thank you! This has been such a life saver for us, and we’ve only been doing it for a week. This afternoon she went outside by herself to play in the sandbox without asking me to come along and without me telling her she needs to have independent play time. She just did it! She has been playing out there for at least a half hour, having fun and working through her frustrations with the sand toys. No sign of her stopping yet!
Mary, YES YES YES YES YES! Well done both of you :)
I felt like Mary was speaking for me about my 31 month old daughter when I read her comment. I have a similar situation on my hands, but no sibling so she is always up in my business. She was much more capable of independent play last year when I ran a daycare out of my home. It wasn’t that she was off playing with the other kids. They were all under two just toddling around doing their own things independently as those of that age set do. Of course there were squirmishes I would have to deal with, but for the most part they happily played during the unstructured portions of our day. I had an amazing rhythm going and it was awesome.
Then, we lost all our clients in a short time to random positive events; moving for a better job, going back on maternity for good, etc. So we closed our home care and moved. That was when she began clinging to me like glue and I still can’t shake her. It was traumatic for her to loose her sibling like friends, and we are still doing our best to recover the damage.
Your post has given me an answer — thank you! I only hope it works and that the tears won’t last long. She does NOT like being without her mama. EVER! I had to leave for 6 hours the other day and she cried to her grandmother the whole time I was gone. Not so good!
Oh sweet little girl missing her mama. I think you are right that it’s likely the transition and change that is causing the clinginess and some consistency, attention, and time and patience will likely do it! And I think willingness to play alone also comes in waves with their developmental milestones too.
So glad i stumbled upon your page. I’m having a hard time getting my 4 year old daughter to have alone playtime. I started putting a timer on her but that to me seems too pushy on my part. I’m going to try your method, alone and out of mama’s sight. hehe
Blanca, yes and give it a few minutes. Sometimes it takes a few minutes before they get over the fact they are alone, ha and then they are happy :)
Great advice! My daughter will play alone sometimes, but other times will be hysterical if I leave the room. I think making it a part of our routine is a great idea.
Thank you for this article.
I have 18 months twin boys. Do you suggest to separate them for independent playtime?
I let them play themselves but haven’t tried separate them.
Ys, I’d separate them for a bit and see how that goes. Then they won’t have to “share” and can really enjoy playing with whatever they choose! Even if it’s just half the time.
Just stumbled upon this a few days ago. THANK YOU for giving permission to foster independent play with my 15 month old. Before reading your blog I would have thought I was rotten to close the door to my son’s room and have him stay in there all alone. This kid screams all the time- he has an older brother and he has few words. There’s a lot of toy taking and screaming in my house. So I think the independent play was a nice break for him, because he screamed for maybe 20 seconds, and then started playing with his toys for 10 minutes! I figured I shouldn’t push him on the first try so I swooped him out of there after those 10 minutes, but I can’t tell you how wonderful it was to have a 10 minute break in the middle of our day in addition to the big nap time break. Thanks a million.
KB, this is exactly it. A few minutes of fussing and then “Wait a minute I can play with these toys and nobody will take them!” And great wisdom on taking baby steps. Before you know it he’ll want to play for 20 or 30 minutes even happily.
Hi, my son does very well with unstructured independent play. We have an open floor plan, so while he happily plays alone, he destroys the house in the process. Lately he has been getting into things he knows are off limits when he’s bored of his toys, or, if he sees me doing chores, will come and disrupt what I’m doing. Do you have any advice on getting him to play in his room with more structure? He’s fourteen months old. He doesn’t need my attention for play, but I feel like I’m constantly redirecting/saying no.
I hope that makes sense, I’m very lucky to have a child that’s content with himself, but I think he would be less destructive with more boundaries. Currently, if I leave the room and shut the door behind me he will scream and cry. Might quiet-time specific toys help?
What happens if you just put him in his room and close the door to play? Or pull it nearly closed so you can see in?
Hi Rachel! This post is awesome! I know it’s old but hoping you’ll see this. I have a 5, 3, and 1 year old (and I homeschool so we’re all home all the time! Yowzer!). I think some days my 3 and 5 year old could do this together, and some days separate. My question is that my 5 yo doesn’t nap but does an awesome job at taking a 2 hour quiet play/rest time every afternoon while the other two kids nap. Is it too much to also have her do 45 min to an hour alone also in the morning? That seems like a lot of alone time (which was why I was thinking maybe she and her brother could do it together). Thoughts on essentially 2 times a day of solo play for her?
Meredith, I don’t do the independent play time if they’re dropping their naps, like you said. It seems like too much alone time in their rooms! So if they are awake in the afternoon for a while then I skip the morning independent play.
Any ideas about what an 4.5 year old, non napping child can do if I have his little sister doing independent play in the morning??
Is that a good time for you and him to have time together?
Hi Rachel,
I really love your Rhythms, Routines & Schedule ebook. Your book and your sleeping blog was my guardian angel during the newborn phase in my home. I still using your book until now! My boy is 14 months old and he is a very content boy. He sleep from 7pm – 8am and his is on 1 nap schedule from 12:30 – 4pm. All thanks to your book. However I would like to start with the independent playtime. Is it possibble to do it in the living room? Or do he need to be in his own bedroom only? I feel like he spend too much time in his bedroom because he is a very good sleeper. I hope you can help.
Oh yes, you can do independent play ANYWHERE!
Thank you for the reply. Do I need to be out of his sight during that time or I can be in the living room too but I do not involve in his independent time?
Out of sight is always better or, if he’s not used to it, he’ll just come to you :) I even put mine in another sibling’s room or even my bedroom. That works too.
Hi! I just happened to stumble upon this and have got some great ideas but I have a question. My 2 year old likes to run around and roam the house and doesn’t really “play”. If like to start independent play time but my husband works from home upstairs where his room is. Any suggestions for independent play time in an open play room? (He can leave/still see me if I’m in the kitchen or living room). Thank you so much!
Can you put him in your room or in a specific room with 4 walls?
I love the idea of having independent play time. My Daughter loves to play by herself but oftentimes I know she gets interrupted by my walking through the room or into the kitchen and then immediately she thinks its time to eat, even though she just ate.
Anyway I’m curious how I could make this work for our family. We currently live in a one bedroom apartment and her crib is in our bedroom, so she doesnt really have a room of her own. Her toys are currently located in our living room, so finding a room where she can play by herself is really the challenge here. Any suggestions?
Hi Rachel. I really have been loving your blog (and wishing I found it earlier :0 ) My son will be 4 in 2 months and is an only child. He never went to daycare as I worked part time and my mom watched him the other 2 days. I had this mommy guilt when he got to around the age of 2, because he didn’t have any siblings (and I didn’t have friends with young children- thus few play dates) so because of the guilt I felt like I had to be his playmate all the time. And now I have an almost 4 year old who is always saying “Mommy, come play with me….” etc. etc. I’m afraid that I have stifled his imagination a bit and his ability to solve problems by himself because I have always been there. (funny how before kids and when he was very young, I thought I’d never be a helicopter Mommy). Anyway, is it too late? We have a funky kind of house. his bedroom area doesn’t have a door. And his playroom opens up into kitchen/living room. The only room with four walls is our bedroom and I can’t trust him in there!!! I understand the point of not being seen, but I’m not sure how to work around the way our house is. I can see if he’ll stay in the play room and if he comes walking into where I am, just keep redirecting him (while telling him that Mommy needs her own time to read, etc). Any suggestions would help…..I’m afraid that if I keep doing what we’re doing I will be raising a needy mama’s boy. Thank you for your wonderful blog!
Hi!! How much time a 7 month old can be independently playing?
Even just 10 minutes in a crib with a few toys is great!
Rachel, I love this and have been doing it with my son nearly 4 yrs, who would possibly nap but fights it the entire time his sister 18 months is sleeping. He moves around or gets into things he shouldn’t during this time, all in an effort to stay awake. This has been going on for months.
He will pull the monitor off the wall, take pictures off the wall, dump his hamper, empty his dresser, take the books off the book shelf. (It is possible I have too many toys in his room). Sometimes it takes over an hour for him to clean his room after independent play time, I used to help but the behavior would continue. Now I just coach him through how to clean up mostly on his own, then he wants to play.
I have recently tried him having independent play with my near by, but he still is getting everything out or interrupting me. I use the time to volunteer doing computer work or doing house work.
Thank you in advance for your suggestions.
I have an 11 year old dad and an 8 year old SS and a 3 month old baby. My older children are very independent from a young age. We homeschool and worked full time and people would always be astonished how my kids would do their schoolwork by routine and independently. My 8 yo use to wake up very early when he was little and would read or play quietly till the rest of us slept. With my little baby girl she LOVES to be close and held and nursed but in the morning when she is happy I lay her down on her lambskin to play independently while I leave the room to do dishes etc. It is about 10-20 minutes depending on the day. Your article was like a lightbulb for me and gave me more ideas on how to keep this up and the fruit of it down the road is a reward.
We have an almost 6 yr old and a 2 year old…should the independent playtime be playing without their sibling as well? I think that is what I am reading…just clarifying! So one goes to one room and the other another room? This would just be on weekends mostly because our oldest is at school during the day. Thanks!
Yes, individual rooms. Or even one in a main living area or the house or your room. The key is they get to be alone during this time. Sibling play also sounds fun :)
Just wanted to comment I love everything you wrote,…from the importance of independent play and how is it so beneficial to our kids is something that can often be overlooked. I work in a school and I see kids that don’t know how to do something alone for even a few minutes. Or if they get free time they have no idea what to even do. When I was young, we always had independent play- whether it was coloring, making something- bracelets or crafts, reading, etc etc. Also I am a new mom to an almost 5 month old baby so I really enjoyed reading this.
Thank you, Erica, and you are so right. When we aren’t used to having time alone we literally don’t know what to do with it! So we end up needing others to entertain us. Time alone playing and entertaining one’s self is really a gift :)
What do I do if I try to leave me 17month old for independent play in his room and he just opens the door and comes right back to find me ? (He can reach the door handles and open them himself). Also if i put a gate at the door he will just stand at the gate and cry and wait for me to come and let him through.
I would like to start learning play independently but he wants me to be near him all the time. He does play with his older siblings for (20-30 minutes) so I can do something meanwhile.
Yulia, you could do something similar to the “silent return” used during sleep training. You can simply not make a huge deal about it, pic him up, take him back and say “time’s not over yet.” And you could aimf or 5 minutes at a time, gradually lengthening it!
I’ve been doing this for years with my 3.5 year old— leaving her on the playroom for independent play and watching her from the video monitor. Recently she has been opening the door and coming out repeatedly in the middle of independent play time. What gives?? How do I make her stay put?
And another question: I have not done this much with my 15 month old for lack of space to leave her. I have a playroom with toys, but only very minimal items in their shared bedroom as it’s for sleeping, not a play space. Sometimes I have my 3.5 and 15 month old do playtime together in the playroom, but I’d like them both to have their own space independently. If I put my 15 month old in her crib for independent play, I worry that she’s in there too much of the day (she’s already in there all night and at nap time- about 14 hrs in a 24 hr period) AND that she’s using it for play when bed should be associated with sleep. If I give the girls their own separate time in the playroom, I miss out on one benefit of this— kid free time to be productive, shower, prep dinner, etc. Thoughts?
Could you put independent play in another part of the house? LIke your room, maybe?
I’m really thankful for your tip about rotating the toys that each kid will play with so they won’t get tired of them. I haven’t bought any new toys for my children since I’m afraid that they’ll discard them eventually. Now that I know how to use them wisely, maybe I should start looking for American-made toys that I can buy.
When children repeat actions over and over, they are mastering new skills and strengthening neural pathways. It’s incredible what children can learn through play! Probably it will sound boring, but chess is the best tool for development throug fun. Chess develops concentration, increases patience and positively affects the intellectual and emotional development of the child. Other best thing about this game, is that child can play with parents, siblings, friends, but it’s also great thing for the independent play. Using chess board to creating imaginary scenarios is one thing, solving chess puzzles is other. There are many possibilities of independent play with chess. For puzzles, I can recommend a book which has tones of them – net-boss.org/chess-puzzles-for-kids-by-maksim-aksanov
This was an interesting read
Good tips especially in the comments
My son is very clingy so if I need to get stuff done it can be hard cuz he would want to follow me everywhere I go or play close to me n gets mad throws a tantrum when I leave for a minute or gets into trouble cus he knows I’m not there either for attention or opportunity.
I tried having baby gates in his playroom n he would be historical n really wouldn’t stop I made that playroom just for him n he won’t even go in unless I’m there or the door is wide open. He gets really scared when he even shuts the door On himself.
The only thing that works kind of is the crib but he throw everything out of it and has learned to open the built in drawers and opens them n closes then hard or takes out everything inside n throws them out to vent out frustration I guess. If I give him toys on there he more likely will throw them out after a few minutes.
Even when I’m handling the baby if I can’t play with him at that moment he throws a tantrum n or tries to do things I tell him not too.
It’s definitely a challenge indeed depending on personalities
I loved playing alone as a kid at my mom house cus I was an introvert. But it seems my son is more extraverted than I was.
He does this with everyone who is in his care.
I do independent play with my 16 month old while I work (I am part-time from home). Currently, he plays in the living room and I sit there in the corner on my laptop. Is he at an age where he should be able to do this alone in his room? Or, would the crib be better? Thanks!
If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it! But yes he could do in any place really :)
What do I do? My 18 month old doesn’t seem to know how to play alone. He tantrums and cries if we are not right there on the floor playing. He comes over and grabs at our pants and wails. We try to get him started with a toy or book on the floor but it lasts for only a few seconds. We are exhausted and need to get some work done! We have changed out toys and play music sometimes but he doesn’t want to play with toys. He is also only saying 3 words. I don’t know if we should be concerned Help!
I’d first address the guilt you have about how him playing on his own is bad or something. IF you have guilt. If you feel no guilt you’ll be able to support him through it until he gest then hang of it. It may take a while and you can do small periods at a time For speech, definitely check with your pediatricina, they are likely not related!
my 3.5 year old has a really hard time with independent play. He did fine while younger, but as he’s gotten older, he is wanting/demanding more attention (at allllllll times). As he is beginning to outgrow naptime, this is getting harder and harder. Any ideas on how to train him being ok with some alone time?
I think first comes the boundaries. Whether he loves it or not isn’t the point. If he can tell you’re serious about it and you choose a reasonable time then he’ll continue to do it. I think that you CAN drop it if you want, of course. But if you are feeling guilty and bad about it then these kids can sense it and keep trying not to! May be a good time to switch toys, etc. too
This article on independent play is an informative and insightful read for parents looking to encourage their child’s independent play. You have provided practical tips and strategies for gradually increasing a child’s ability to play on their own, while also emphasizing the importance of nurturing a child’s imagination and creativity. Overall, this article is a valuable resource for any parent looking to promote healthy independent play habits in their child.
Hi and thank you for the article. Just a question my 14 month old very much struggles.with independent play and follows me around the house like a little puppy, usually crying to be held. To try to combat this I’ve been sitting down with her with an activity for 5 mins and showing her how to do something or simply playing e.g stacking blocks etc. once she’s engaged I get up a leave….only for her to literally play on her own for 4 minutes and come back to me, grabbing my legs and crying again. This has been going on for weeks and I’m nearing the end of my tether! She has a lovely playroom where she can see me and it is light and bright. should I try putting a gate over the door? If she resists the gate (which she will) how long do I ignore her protests and what do I do…go inside and play again, or let her out?? I desperately need some help!
Hi there, i’m hoping to try this but i have one question thats bothering me….. what do i do when he just hops up and walks out of that room he’s playing in? He’s 14months and doesn’t really understand if i tell him to play in there by himself and he’s not to come out.