• Home
  • About Rachel
  • Contact
    • Work With Me
  • My Shop
  • Start Here

A Mother Far from Home

  • Discipline
    • Toys And Play
    • Big Family
    • Family Culture
    • Diapers & Potty Training
    • Irish Twins
    • Teething
  • Emotions
  • Faith
    • Christian Holidays
    • Church Related
    • Spiritual Principles
  • Home
    • Cleaning & Chores
    • Meal Time & Eating
    • Organizing, Tidying & Decluttering
    • Emergency Preparedness For Families
  • Motherhood
    • Mental & Emotional Wholeness
    • Mother’s Helper
    • Type A
    • Books to Read
    • Pregnancy
  • Routine
    • Baby Schedules & Routines
    • Toddler Routines & Schedules
    • Mom Schedules & Routines
    • School Routines
  • Sleep
    • Sleep Troubleshooting
    • Napping Tips
    • Basic Sleep Tips
Home » Mom Life » Why you need to learn to “zoom out”

Why you need to learn to “zoom out”

Updated May 25, 2020

260shares

Want simple chaos-erasing family routines? Who doesn't? Check out our Family Routines Reboot!

Want simple chaos-erasing family routines? Who doesn't? Check out our Family Routines Reboot!

It’s time we get together and do some big picture thinking. So much of our own guilt trips, pressures, and stress come from the moment to moment urgent things of life.

big picture thinking

I think it comes with the territory. When we’re in the thick of motherhood (particularly when the kids are little) nearly every waking moment focuses on the present. Who needs what and where do they need it. We become tired, stressed, and overwhelmed. Priorities and realities can become skewed and in certain situations it seems we can’t see the forest for the trees.

This is where we need to be wise. We need to look ahead. We need to “zoom out” and think about our lives and situations from a larger perspective than the day to day grind.

1. Big Picture Thinking.

It’s easy to get grouchy and irritable when we’re in a hard season. One reason is because nobody likes hard things. But another is because we tend to project the hard times over our entire lives. As though it’ll never change. Never get better. Never look up.

That simply isn’t the case. Big picture thinking says that what’s happening now (endless diaper changes, meltdowns, and night feedings) will morph into something else later. It’s one square of a larger quilt. A necessary and beautiful square, but not the end product.

2. Urgent isn’t always important.

Some entrepreneur expert (whose name I cannot remember) said when faced with the important vs. the urgent, do the important. I’ve started doing that with my work and have had a major increase in productivity. Why? Because the “urgent” will always get done. If in fact it is urgent. The important, however, will get pushed around to make room for the urgent.

Urgent would be folding a stack of clothes. Important might be reading with your children. Of course the clothes need to be folded, and because of that they will get folded. However, you can go days without spending quality time with your child because you’re so busy trying to do something “urgent.”

If you are deep in overwhelm and need to brainstorm to Get Out then try this overcoming overwhelm packet. It’ll give you big changes quickly!

3. Learn a lesson from nature.

One of the biggest favors you can do for yourself is to embrace your season of life. In nature there’s winter, spring, summer, and fall. A tree with no leaves is not a failure in the winter. An tree with no flowers is not a failure in fall. When you feel at the complete end of your rope, know that it is truly only one season in your life.

There are special considerations for every season, and each one will have its ups and downs. Advantages and disadvantages. But just because you feel unproductive right now doesn’t mean your life will be unproductive. Just because you don’t feel full of fruit right now doesn’t mean you won’t produce a large harvest next year.

zoom out

4. It cuts the guilt.

Guilt can be a useful emotion when it convicts us of our own wrongdoing and encourages us to change for the better. False guilt, on the other hand, is a crippling liar. You feel guilty you don’t buy all organic vegetables even though you’d literally  have to charge it to your credit card to do so. False guilt is this vague sense that you are doing something very wrong though you can’t quite put your finger on it. And it’s awful.

Zooming out and changing your current view to big picture thinking is a great way to help stop the false guilt. You can feel guilty for “depriving” your children of things now, but you know it’s better in the long run. You feel guilty taking some time to yourself (like a mommy vacay), but know that without that time you’re actually not the type of mother you want to be.

5. It helps build character.

Our children’s and our own. Someone once told me that character can be summed up by two questions.

  1. What decision would you make if no one was looking or would ever find out?
  2. Can you make the right decision even if it’s the hardest one?

When we zoom out, look at the big picture of our goals or vision for our homes, it’s easier to make decisions in the present. It’s easier to make tough decisions regarding our kids and to stop taking short cuts that we hate but find easy in the moment. “Zooming out” helps take the pressure off of us because we are thinking long term. We can see the hard seasons as an opportunity to grow our character and our resistance. Zooming out will give you peace that’s eluded you and strength to keep going when times are tough.

overcome-overwhelm-banner-for-posts

If you are stressed, overwhelmed, or drained… you aren’t alone.

After hearing from thousands of mothers, I’ve narrowed down the Top 5 Biggest Stressors For Moms. Sign up below and I’ll send my FREE series straight to your inbox!

Click here and learn breakthrough strategies that’ll help you feel peace immediately.

End Mom Stress. Live in peace, not overwhelm

Rachel

New to this community? Start here, friend.

260shares

Filed Under: Mom Life4

« Raising Homemakers (Proverbs 31)
How To Treat Ant Bites Naturally (& Get Rid of Ant Beds!) »

Recommended For You From Our Shop

The Everyday Mom Super Bundle

Want a harmonious home where the kids follow your lead, emotions are under control (theirs and yours), everyone is sleeping well, and your family culture makes everyone feel loved and secure?... Grab my Everyday Mom Super Bundle which has nearly ALL my shop printables in ONE place at a fraction of the price!

Click to Learn More!

I'm Rachel, mother of 5 young kids living in the Florida panhandle with my Australian husband. I write about family culture, family rhythms and routines, and boundaries in motherhood and life. You can see snippets of my daily life here and visit my shop for baby sleep, organizing, and routine help.

“Inside my brain”

Geeezzz, it was like you were inside my brain today!  (and most days recently)  I needed this badly.

Thank you!!!
Andrea P.

“Nothing was working…”

I just wanted to say thank you for your easy peasy routine for 2 year olds! I day-weaned my 2 year old a month ago and have been trying everything to get him to go down for a nap without the nursing. Nothing was working and I was starting to think he would never have a nap again.

Anyways I started following your routine and we just sat in bed and had what I told him was “quiet time.” We sat and read and made a fort and had warm milk. Then today I told him it was quiet time again and he tried to escape the bed a couple times, but in the end he snuggled up after the warm bottle and fell asleep for 3 hours! I was almost in tears I was so excited! So thank you!

Meghan

“Thanks for your bundle!”

Thanks for for doing this Everyday Mom Super Bundle sale. I’m four months into my parenthood journey with a sweet and spirited boy.

I was feeling overwhelmed and frustrated just yesterday, thinking if only I had the right resources and “trail guides” I could figure this all out. Your sale is serendipitous. I can’t wait to dig into my download materials and start learning from your tips.

Thanks for sharing your knowledge!

Lauren N.

“It’s a breath of fresh air”

I just wanted to let you know that your blog and emails have been a tremendous help to me. Your practical, honest, and humble writing is a breath of fresh air!

With help and encouragement drawn from your writing, I have made some incredible changes in the order (and sanity) of our home, in just the past few weeks. My kids are doing chores daily, and I also have clearer expectations of myself.

My husband is in awe!

Which helps reinforce what you said- the problem wasn’t me; it was my systems. Our home is in much better order, and so is my mind. So, thank you!!!! You have made a difference for me and my family.

Ann S.

“We are slowly getting back to normal…”

I stumbled upon your blog one morning after praying night after night for God to fix my home! I had just had a baby this May 1st and also have a 2 and 4 year old and my home broke out in complete chaos!

Even my marriage seemed like it was on the brink of extinction and this had happened in 2 weeks! I read numerous amounts of your entries and applied them to my home life and I am happy to say we are slowly getting back to normal. Thank you Rachel! 

Madison S.

“You’ve been a life saver!”

I’m a first time mom to a 15 day old baby girl. I had no idea what I was doing and couldn’t get her to sleep in her crib until I found your blog.

You’ve been a life saver!

Candace R.

“Within a week or two our little girl changed!”

I tumbled into post partum depression/anxiety and didn’t know what to do anymore. I was a mess, baby girl was a mess and I don’t even know how my husband was dealing with it all… 

I googled everything I could think about but there was never really something that felt right, that felt genuine instead of just telling do’s and don’ts. 

And then I found your website and read your pieces about sleeping and eating. I carefully read through your schedules and decided to try it.

IT WORKED!! 

And within a week or two our little girl changed from a frustrated baby into this happy dappy smiling ray of sunshine, that is able to settle herself down by sucking on her fists, even in the middle of the night. At 12 weeks baby girl slept through the night and now at 20 weeks old she sleeps a good 10 to 12 hours every night. 

I just wanted to thank you for sharing your experience online. The way you wrote your experiences made it understandable, seeing it from the babys side but also the moms side. Maybe we were lucky that your way fitted our baby, but it worked and I tell it to everyone that wants to know!

Stephanie P.

“Had tremendous success from Day One!”

I just wanted to thank you for your sample routine.  I’ve been using it for a week with my 13 month old and had tremendous success from day 2! Wind down time is so important and so is consistency.  Thank you so much!!!

Sam M.

“In a few short days…”

I am grateful to have found your blog, as I do a great deal of searching on Pinterest when I am up against a parenting moment that I do not feel qualified to handle.

I will say though that since reading your blog I am really focusing on remembering that every moment is a learning \ experience for my son and I try to take a breath and count to ten. In the few short days that I have been exercising this method I truly have noticed a change for the better in his response to me.

Tami K.

Comments

  1. michelle says

    Beautiful post! I suffer from that crippling guilt you mention, but I feel as though it makes me spend more time with my kids so I guess it’s not that horrible. :) It’s always great to gain a little perspective, though! Thank you for this- I needed this after an oh-too-short weekend! :)

    Reply
    • Rachel Norman says

      Aren’t they ALWAYS too short? And I’m right there with you on the guilt!

      Reply
  2. Marie says

    Beautiful

    Reply
    • Rachel Norman says

      Thank you :)

      Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Hey y'all, I'm Rachel Norman, BA, MS, Language of Listening® parenting coach, mother to 5 babies in 5 years on 3 continents, no multiples. Join me in parenting without losing your mind. Read More >>

Search

Copyright © 2021 All Rights Reserved | A Mother Far From Home | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Accessibility














15 Minute Projects To Get Your Home In Order

In just 15 minutes a night (while you're in your pj's!) take your home from stressed out to organized with these 101+ 15 minute projects. 


envelope
envelope
close
x
close

Download, print, and become a more peaceful, less stressed mom!

envelope
x