When you are pregnant, well… things get hard. They are beautiful and wonderful and you are so blessed and privileged to be carrying a life inside of you, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t feeling all the feels. Here is what pregnancy “feels” like, dear husband.
(Note: I know pregnancy is a great privilege, joy, and blessing and this post is not intended to make light of that, but to speak to the reality of all the feels.)
“Girls always ‘feel’ everything,” my friend’s brother told us.
They don’t say “It’s cold outside” they say, “I feel like it’s cold.”
They don’t say, “I want to go,” they say, “I feel like it’s time to go home.”
He looked at all of us girls like we would disagree. “Yeah, so, what’s your point?” we said.
Just what he said. Girls “feel” a bit too much.
And honestly… who can argue with that?
Right now, I’m 30 weeks pregnant and feeling All the Feels and life is all Very Dramatic with the hormone situation. My husband is Type B so calm and caring, and yet even so… I can tell he does not quite know how pregnancy feels. I’ve made him skim through this book, but that didn’t seem to do it.
I hope this post will help him. And your husband. And men round the world…
Pregnancy “Feels” Like You’re Blocking My Path to the Bed
If you are standing between me and my bed then you better have mace or a defensive weapon because things are gonna get ugly. Of course, I try to get as much sleep as I can while being pregnant, but I’ve got to tell you in no uncertain terms: it’s never enough. Even with this or this… those provide only momentary relief.
I can sleep 12 hours a night (yeah right) and take a 3 hour nap and I will still hit you and run over anything that stops me from crashing into my bed at whatever hour of the day it’s available. My body spends most of the day trying to shut down mid diaper change, laundry load, or peanut butter & jelly sandwich making session so when I finally have the chance, run for your life.
Pregnancy “Feels” Like I Don’t Care About Your Dinner
There, I said it. I don’t care about your dinner or the kids’ dinner because I’ve been eating all day anyway and now I feel sick and want to go to bed. Refer to #1. I will continue to offer as many healthy meals as I can and nourish my family since I love y’all, but I need to let you know your expectations should downgrade.
Meals won’t be fancy. They won’t be complicated. They won’t make Instagram worthy photos. They will be edible and (hopefully) warm and that’s it. I feel like more than that is a pipe dream that will leave you disappointed. If that bothers others, I refer them to this book.
Pregnancy “Feels” Like Your Kids Were Abducted And Replaced
No, I won’t let go of all the family boundaries. I won’t let the kids get away with pushing the envelope too far. I will do my best to keep their behavior under control. But all the middle ground stuff? That stuff that maybe I “do” stop or discourage when I’m feeling sprite and skinny? That stuff… yeah I don’t care about that stuff anymore. I’d rather let that stuff slide for a few months than get my Whale Shaped Body off the couch, bed, or floor where it is currently residing.
You will wonder why the noise level of the house has gone up. I will use my go to tricks to get everyone to Stop Talking. But I’ll also send them outside and let them scream their heads off and hopefully they’ll all have on clothes otherwise everyone who drives by will see 3 or 4 half (or fully) naked kids screaming in our yard. And I feel like that’s okay with me right now.
Pregnancy “Feels” Like Imma Lose It At Any Minute
It isn’t that I am a different person now that I’m With Child. I’ve just got extra hormones coursing through my veins (or wherever hormones go) and they are tempting me to lose the grip on my emotions. Every feeling I have is just under the surface and what might have seemed cute or sweet 5 months ago can turn me into an angry mom if I’m not careful.
Right now, until our darling baby arrives, I need you to be strong. I need you to not start acting crazy and expecting miracles and demanding things like clean baseboards or no spiderwebs in high corners or a well-organized sock drawer. I need you to keep me accountable for being a reasonable person, but understand that my reasonableness is in a Vulnerable State right now.
Pregnancy “Feels” Like Don’t Make Me Laugh, Cough, or Stand Up
I am blessed and privileged to be able to carry our child, I know that. I wouldn’t trade it for the world, but I’m telling you… weird things happen to you when you’re pregnant. And don’t go acting like you don’t believe me because I’m a Type A woman and you know I exaggerate. I’m telling you things start happening you can’t even imagine.
Not only do I have to get up and go to the bathroom approximately 2,346 times a night, but my ligaments also stop working from 11 pm to 5 am so it takes 3 times as long to get there. I swell, ache, leak, and sweat. Things double in size and then change color. I need you to just tell me I look nice but don’t go on and on about it.
I don’t believe you anyway, but it’s worse if you say nothing.
5 minutes after delivering my youngest son I was still laying on the delivery table. Though he came out with only one push (oh yes, that’s right) and there were no complications I was bleeding more heavily than they’d have liked. They were milling about and doing this or that when the doctor looked up at me with concern on her face and asked, “How are you feeling, honey?”
I startled everyone in the room when I replied in a very enthusiastic voice…
“I feel amazing… I’M NOT PREGNANT ANYMORE!”
I “feel” like that was an appropriate response… don’t you?
….Would you like a nice printable letter to hang on your fridge for your hubby? You know, to remind him of these things? Sign up below with your email and I’ll send it to your inbox ;)
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After this free series:
- you’ll find more rest for your growing body
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